Just Some Thoughts

It always seems, like the troubles you’re having right now with your kid(s) are the only ones there have ever been. How quickly you forget the newborn sleepless nights, the waking up three or four times to feed. The nights spent lying on the couch, breastfeeding and clock-watching. The colic that seemed endless.

When people around you with babies complain about the same thing, you find yourself thinking ‘oh, that wasn’t so bad’. How quick we are to forget. And dismiss other people’s problems as trivial. But when you were going through it yourself, it was the end of the fucking world.

How quickly you forget the post-natal depression. And the fact that at one point in time, you despised your baby, and didn’t feel like a mother. Rather you felt like a babysitter. A pair of breasts to feed a little demon. How quickly you forget the denial, and the fervent wishes that you could go back and change things. Not be a mother. Not have a  screaming child at 3 in the morning.

How quickly you forget, once your child is sleeping through the night, what it means to be sleep-deprived. And once you’ve achieved sleeping through the night, how simple it seems. And how you try to explain your method to other mothers. Who just don’t seem to get it.

Yes, parenting is hard. Parenting is the most difficult thing I’ve ever had to do. But I’ve learnt one thing. Whatever drama you’re facing now, that seems like the end of the world. It’s only temporary.

There’s something far worse waiting around the corner.

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6 Responses

  1. I never forget how hard it was. I had the depression and I remember very vividly think about what it would look like to chuck my wailing baby against the wall like a football. Thank got for depression drugs!

  2. i suppose i was lucky. i really didn’t have any postpartum depression and coped quite well with sleep depravity. i actually loved getting up see my baby, even if i could barely keep my eyes open. now, however, is a different story – not that i don’t LOVE every moment my toddler tells me no no no, but… ok, so i don’t.

  3. Now that I’m pregnant again – my memory is refreshed.
    First thought after seeing 2 lines – yipee!!
    Second thought – FUCK!!!!!
    Third thought – How will I cope when there is 2.
    Fourth thought – Stop thinking so much and get something to eat!!!

  4. Aint that the truth!

    I have a 3 yr old and a colicky 3 month old… and I couldnt have said it better!

  5. Yea… the teenage stage

    (mommy of a 14, and 8 year old)

  6. […] Just Some Thoughts (abadmommyblog.wordpress.com) […]

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